hangover.uggghhh.

Morning turds. I trust you slept well. Not me. Well, I did when I finally put my head down. Now, running on somewhere around three or four hours sleep (Does it really count when you're all hopped up on jager-bombzzzz?) I am sitting at work contemplating a great many things... Things like "How am I going to get obnoxiously rich?", "Why does Jager or Red Bull by themselves taste like armpits, but when you combine the two, literal specks of heaven rain down upon my soul?", "Where is Darkness at?!", "Why do I continue to abuse my body on a more-than-a-few-times-a-week basis?"....

 I came here with full intentions to re-write my previous post that was lost to the vast, unknown reaches of the internet yesterday but you know what? I'm not gunna. Instead, I am going to give you a brief run down on alcohol titled....

Hi, My Name Is T and I'm A Borderline Alcoholic.

(my parents are going to hate this post)



I remember ten years ago (holy shit, really?) when I had my first run in with the Devil in liquid form. Actually, let's go back even further to one of my earliest memories in this stage of the soul. When I was a wee-T, somewhere around the age of threeish? I remember wobbling across the living room floor of my parents place to my grandfather or as called him, "Grandeddy". I don't remember any words, but what I do remember is something that would stick with me till this day. He was sitting in his chair drinking a Budweiser from the can. He hoisted me up into his lap, said something to the same effect as the adults from Peanuts and handed me the Bud. I grabbed it cautiously, peeped around for my Dad and then took a swig. Then I immediately spewed it out. It was the equivalent to piss in my mind. I vowed from that point on that I would never drink and I would never smoke.

Boy, how things change. Roughly twelve years later, after much internal debate I gave in to peer pressure and drank with a red giant named Stephen. He introduced me to two bottles. Everclear and 151. That's strong, even for a seasoned veteran but I didn't know any better. I took three shots of Everclear and nothing happened, or at least I thought nothing was happening. On the outside I was fine and wanted a sandwich. On the inside, my body was transforming into something else. Something rigid and set on destruction. Needless to say, those shots kicked in to high gear and I made a sandwich while doing the lean from Michael Jackson's "Smooth Criminal". Did I mention I was trying to hide my drunken behavior from my friend's parents who were standing on either side of me? That night will go down in infamy, stored in my brain somewhere between "Hobo-finger-smash!" and "Stinky Steve drank his own vomit."

What I am getting at here is I opened Pandora's proverbial box a while ago and have yet to show signs of slowing down. I have had more adventures making questionable decisions under the influence than just about anyone (outside of my social circle[DAT RITE DARE GOES OUT TO ALL MY THUGS AND THUGETTES IN MUH REEL WORLD]) that I know. Some would look at this as a very bad sign but I feel as though I excel under the stress. Here are some pro and cons/highs and lows of my history with alcohol.

pros/highs:

-I have yet to hit a woman in an angered state of mind. (Acts like smacking a Clarmont strippers bare ass is not in the same category as giving your sweetheart a black eye. Frowned upon maybe, but even then it depends on who you're asking. Sometimes it's encouraged!)

-I have not been mugged leaving any Ponce/Murder Kroger area events. I pay attention to my surroundings.

-Getting bomb drunk on spring break in P.C. and not  remembering most of it. (FUCK YOU FOR JUDGING ME!)

-Upping the evening at almost every "get away from the city" spot I have gone to.

-I don't have any tattoos from a rough night on the rocks.

-No little T's I don't know about running around.

-Nights on tour that I don't even know how to explain.

-Never gotten significantly hurt under the influence

-No arrests, period.

-Dragon*Con.

-I haven't pissed the bed.

cons/lows

-Hangovers. The way these things have mutated over the years boggles my mind every time I have one.

-Getting bomb drunk on spring break in P.C. and not  remembering most of it. (FUCK YOU FOR JUDGING ME!)

This is a very brief list but I honestly can't think of any more lows. Though, to be fair, hangovers are pretty terrible and weigh in pretty hard. Still... I think the pros here outweigh the cons. I also don't drink for the taste.

I believe I am rambling now. The whole point of this entry was to... Well, I'm not really sure anymore. The point now is I don't like being hungover. There you have it. My brain hurts and I want to put my head down on my desk but that is frowned upon at work. Maybe I will go find Darkness and try to tame him. I think it's a him.

Last few lines and then you can get off my lawn. Darkness is a stray black cat that loiters around my work. Being that I was a loiter for a long time, I feel for the dude even though he doesn't seem akin to my charm. I shall make him like me.

To be continued....

Sunova!

I just wrote a novel of a post and you know what happened? DO YOU!? I sure as fuck don't. I turned my head for thirty seconds and when I turned back there was nothing on the screen but "ts" and it saved. Oh well. I'll let you know my plans for world dominance soon enough children. In the meantime....


ts

fuck.

Still no update...

..BECAUSE YUR BOY T! HAS DISCOVED THE GREATNESS THAT IS MASS EFFECT! Seriously though, I am going to try and get two new posts up this week. Wish me luck!

The pains of being bored at heart.

Welcome back loyal followers! I haven't posted an actual blog with words in a minute so what better day than today? Trouble is, I am kind of drawing a blank here. What's good? Mass Effect? I got nothing. Maybe I should go lie face down in an empty bath tub covered with a mattress and just lay there for a while. Nothing gets those gears moving like a good ole' natural hallucination! Self-driven madness might be the ticket.

No, no. I feel as though I am becoming fully complacent, which is odd considering that lately I have been accomplishing things on a small scale. The creativity is waning I guess. It's terrible really when you think about it. I am all of 25 and my juices are drying up at the moment. BLAME THE INTERNET!

You know what would be cool?

So, I have this idea for a photo shoot thing I want to head up that involves zombies, professional make-up artists (all you lucky ladies within my group of friends who excel at this sort of thing), some destruction, and some bright lights.

I want to do semi-cinematic photo shoot once the leaves start changing color and would need roughly 20 bodies who are willing to waste some time with me and my camera. Keep this in mind people. I will provide pizza and beer when things are said and done. Deal?

Ok, back to me being complacent. I may have been harsh. I actually feel like I'm doing some shit lately. I mean hell, I did a an actual shoot with a band Sunday(Preview shot is in my previous post). This week has been boring and having a broken pinky toe didn't help. *Side note: My toe has all but healed up since Sunday, which is insane considering that it was a spreading, swollen purple mass yesterday morning and now it is just a little larger than normal.*

It is my lack of writing that is beginning to drive me insane. UUUUGGHHHHHHHH!

On the positive side of things, I will be eating BBQ tonight, Sam has given a new found love for Jay-Z that I did not know existed and Dragon*Con is only a few weeks away. I have been growing a mustache for close to a month already and have two weeks worth of growth ahead. My Luigi will be superb. If you people go to this and don't dress up, you are totally missing out. Case in point: I went for like four years before I ever dressed up and had fun. I dressed up last year and I believe I may have found the meaning of life in those three days. Do yourself a favor and cut up some boxes, make a Lego costume and go ham. Or get asked if you are dressed up as hipsters again. Either way I will still think you are cool but will probably keep my distance during the festivities.

I guess this goes to the next part of Dragon*Con I need to figure out. How are we going to get booze in the Marriott. I can not afford that retarded bar again this year. While I may spend a nice sum of money there hanging out with every one's favorite jheri-curled bartender at SKYBAR, I am more interested in sneaking a nice large bottle of vodka and/or, your favorite frat buddy, Jagermeister into the festivities and letting the mayhem ensue. I guess only time will tell. Expect an awesome, two to three day late photo update that week.

-Yours truly, T-Pizzle.
 ADIOS TURD NUGGETS!

week2

week2, a set on Flickr.

week #2. Blah.

Week1

Okay, so I am gonna back up and punt here. The challenge I set for myself may have been a little to much (being that I feel like I am sort of a perfectionist). What I have decided to do is upload a minimum of seven of my favorite pictures from the week pryer. This set a few oldies in it, but it also has some newbies. Anyway, I hope you like'm.

RE: IMA GIVE THIS POST-UH-PIC-CHUR-UH-DAY THING UH SHOT...

Ok people, don't lose faith in me yet. I have been taking tons of pictures and between being pressed for time and hungover, I have not got anything posted yet. There are tons of pics in my Flickr account that I painstakingly added yesterday. It took literally four plus hours. It took so long that I had to leave my apartment for the night and didn't get to label and distribute any of them. Take a gander if you want to go ahead and get a sneak peak. Hopefully, they will be posted today. UUUGGGHHHHHH.